Why are Revisions so Hard?

Hello everybody,

So as I mentioned in my previous post, I have been trying to get revisions done on my current project. I absolutely hate doing revisions because they take so much time and effort, and I always feel like all of my writing sucks while I'm doing it, which really isn't a good feeling.

All of that being said, I've been doing fairly well with them lately. I managed to actually read through my entire manuscript without absolutely hating myself by the end of it, and managed to find all of the major problems that I need to fix as soon as humanly possible. Seeing as, before this particular project, I've always given up on revisions after the first two or three chapters, I feel like I'm making quite a bit of progress.

As of yesterday, I've managed to edit five chapters of my novel. I realize that this doesn't sound like much, but its already got me at approximately 11,000 words for this version of the manuscript. My first draft is always really bare bones, which kind of sucks. When I've taken part in NaNoWriMo each time over the last three years, I always just barely pass the 50k mark, and usually there is a lot of story that I intended to tell, but it didn't make it onto the page. I've been trying to add some of that plot while also removing things from the original manuscript that I really don't need, and so far its been working (or at least, I think it is). The manuscript is longer than it initially was, but I'm much happier with its contents than I was before.

My problem is that after revising the last chapter, which almost quadrupled in size and became the longest chapter in the book so far, I've hit a bit of a road block. I'm normally pretty good at powering through some writers block and still getting some words on the page, but that becomes significantly harder to do when you're trying to edit and revise. I can't just spit out words onto the page anymore. I have to actually think really carefully about them and make sure that I'm making the right choices. This is incredibly difficult to do when I can barely concentrate on two or three sentences of the chapter.

In all honesty, it's most likely because this is a chapter that I have to make a lot of changes in. I had some characterization issues with one of the main characters, and this is where they started, so I have to fix the root of the problem here and then continue to fix all of the problems that stemmed from it throughout the rest of the book. There is also a lot of character interaction within this chapter which always makes me nervous. I feel like dialogue is something that I can never get quite right, and when at least a quarter of a chapter is interactions between characters that I'm supposed to fix and make better it is always terrifying.

Basically, what i'm saying is that I really, really wish that revisions were easier to do. Really, I wish that first drafts just happened perfectly and revisions would never legitimately have to happen, but I know that is never going to be the case. I'm going to try and get at least half way through this chapter today since my exams officially start tomorrow.

Wish me luck!
Helen.